With a nod to On the Forecheck, I present some alternative nicknames for some of our favorite (and not so favorite) players from this past season. 

Personal favorites are bolded.  Used middle names for effect in some cases, and had to skip poor Zharkov, as I couldn't find an anagram program that could make anything resembling English with his name.

Zachary Justin Parise - JAUNTIER AS CRAZY SHIP

Travis Zajac - IT'S JAVA CZAR

Martin Pierre Brodeur - BRAINIER, TOP MURDERER

David Clarkson - VANDALS OR DICK

Matthew Corrente - THREW ACE TORMENT

Yann Danis - A SAD NINNY

Patrick Davis - STARK, ACID VIP

Mark Fraser - FAR REMARKS

Andy Greene - ENRAGE DENY

Ilya Kovalchuk - YUCK! OK VIA HALL

Jamie Langenbrunner - JEER ALARM BENIGN NUN

Pierre-Luc Letourneau-Leblond - BRUTAL, RUDE, LONELIER OPULENCE

Paul Martin - INPUT ALARM (sounds like something Jason Lee would name one of his children)

Dean McAmmond - MAN! COMMANDED

Mike Mottau - I'M OK, MUTATE

Robert Niedermayer - MERRY, OBEDIENT, RARE

Jay Paul Pandolfo - JOY AND FOUL APPAL

Rod Pelley - OLD YELPER

Andrew Peters - DAWN PESTERER

Brian Lee Rolston - INSOLENT LABORER (oddly fitting)

Anssi Salmela - AIMLESS NASAL

Bryce Chad Salvador - SACREDLY DRAB HAVOC

Martin Skoula - OK! AN ALTRUISM

Colin White - WIN HOT LICE

Dainius Gintas Zubrus - STUN AURA SUBSIDIZING

David Johnny Oduya - UNDO AVID, HANDY JOY

Niclas Bergfors - IF SCORN GARBLES

Patrik Elias - ATRIAL SPIKE

Lou Lamoriello - OUR ILL, MALE LOO